Changing My Story
What stories do we tell ourselves about who we are? When we look in the mirror, do we speak kind words, or do we pick apart our perceived flaws? When things go wrong, do we beat ourselves up, or do we accept our missteps with grace? Do we allow ourselves to sit with difficult feelings, or do we numb them with distractions? The truth is, none of us always sits in a positive space regarding our self-image. However, we have the power to create the stories and narratives of our lives.
I have found myself in many dark spaces recently, questioning my worth and my place in the world. I’ll never forget the day I walked through my door and fell to my knees, where my daughters had to hold me as I wept uncontrollably. My sister had to come over and sit with me for hours, taking my handgun with her for my safety. There were days when I stayed in bed, crying for weeks on end, asking myself, “Is this my story? Am I truly not chosen? Am I really unlovable? Am I really not enough?” These questions haunted me, and this is not the narrative I want for myself. This is not how I want to exist.
So, I decided to put in the work to change my story. It’s challenging to look in the mirror and say, “You are enough, you are lovable, you are chosen,” but I do it every morning. Some days, I feel it in my very depths; on other days, I force myself to believe it. This morning, I had to force myself, but one thing I refuse to do is believe that I’m not enough. Magic lies beyond this part of my journey, and I choose to wait with patience and temperance for my always.
Three Ways I Am Changing My Story
1. Embracing Self-Love and Affirmation: One of the most significant changes I’ve made is incorporating daily affirmations into my routine. Every morning, I stand in front of the mirror and affirm my worth, reminding myself that I am enough, lovable, and chosen. This practice helps reshape my internal narrative and combat the negative thoughts that try to take hold. Even on the days when I don’t fully believe it, repeating these affirmations reinforces a new, positive story about who I am.
2. Seeking Support and Building a Community: I have learned the importance of not isolating myself in times of struggle. Reaching out to loved ones, whether it’s my sister, my daughters, or friends, has been crucial in my healing process. Their support provides a sense of connection and reminds me that I am not alone. Building a community of support has helped me realize that it’s okay to lean on others and that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.
3. Practicing Self-Compassion and Grace: Another critical aspect of changing my story is practicing self-compassion. I am learning to be kinder to myself, especially when I make mistakes or face setbacks. Instead of berating myself, I try to approach my challenges with understanding and grace. This shift in perspective allows me to see my journey as a process of growth rather than a series of failures.
As I continue to rewrite my story, I am committed to embracing a narrative that is full of self-love, resilience, and hope. I know that my journey is ongoing and that some days will be more challenging than others. However, I am choosing to believe in my worth and to cultivate a life that reflects the truth of who I am.
To anyone reading this who might be struggling with their own narrative, know that you have the power to change your story. It takes time, effort, and patience, but it’s worth it. Remember, you are enough, you are lovable, and you are chosen. Embrace your journey, and look forward to the magic that lies beyond this part of your path.
Always. #joy ✌️🏝❤️
